Penis Reduction Pills (90 day supply)

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Our flagship product! Three bottles, each containing around a 30 day supply of our un-patented penis reduction placebos, with a bright label giving the correct dosages, warnings, and other necessary information. You can save them all for yourself, or give them out to your friends once they see how much it’s helped you.

Our company logo and Penis Reduction Pills appear prominently and should be easily visible to most folks.  The label also gives recommended daily intake and safety instructions.

We ship this to you in our deluxe 8″ x 8″ x 8″ box, which has our logo displayed on all six exterior surfaces in at least 36 pt type.

$14.95

+ shipping

Penis Reduction Pills (30 day supply)

Posted by admin

Our flagship product!One bottle, containing around a 30 day supply of our un-patented penis reduction placebos, with a bright label giving the correct dosages, warnings, and other necessary information. Our company logo and “Penis Reduction Pills” appear prominently and should be easily visible to most folks.

We ship this to you in our deluxe 8″ x 8″ x 8” box, which has our logo displayed on all six exterior surfaces in at least 36 pt type.

$9.95

+ shipping

Internet Search Engine Optimization scams

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I get a lot of email from various internet specialists who offer me services to do things like “increase your page rank in Google”, or “pick the right keywords so people can find you better”, and, frankly, I’m mystified since right now I think we’re ranked great in Google.

If you, for example, do a search for “penis reduction pill” then we’re almost always the first link. And, the second link and third link as well. In fact, most of the links on the front page are to this site, so frankly I think these SEO specialists would have their work cut out for us.

Thank god we’re not in the penis enlargement pill business (and, for heavens sake, WHY?) because for some reason lots of folks seem to be selling them. Lord knows a day doesn’t go by that I don’t see to get some kind of email asking me to buy something to make my penis bigger, or longer, or harder, or whatever, and I just have to laugh to myself and say “Oh, I’m of the opinion that mine is quite large enough, thank you, so much so that I’m taking a penis reducing placebo every morning and want everyone to know that.”

Our products helping win the war!

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A photo of one of our bumper stickers on a troop transport in Iraq.

Our products aren’t just helping here in the states (and, Canada.) For example, here’s a photos of one of our customers, who finds that the pills are helping our troops in Iraq. Just the knowledge that our fine fighting men may need pills to make their penises smaller lets the people know that our fine fighting men may have larger than usual penises.

If you’re a member of the active military, mention that in the comments field on the checkout and we’ll double the size of your pills order automatically for you. And we’ll toss in a couple bumper stickers for you too.

We’ve been acquired!

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I guess I’m pleased to say that the assets and intellectual property of Penis Reduction Pills has been acquired by Placebo Labs, a California company which has been advancing the use and misuse of placebos in the marketplace today.  I’ll be a vice president, overseeing something or the other — I’m sure they’ll find good stuff for me to do.

I’m a bit melancholy about this – certainly, it’s been a tough road so far bringing granddad’s company back to life, with a lot of ups and downs, and sales haven’t been as good as I would have hoped for, but Placebo Labs will be able to bring a lot of new capital and brainpower and I’m sure that together we’ll succeed beyond my wildest dreams.